Dear Bluma: I’m 50 and Fabulous. Now How Do I Find a Date?

Dear Bluma,

How can I find a man in his 50 - 60’s to go on a date?

~50's and Fabulous

...............

Dear 50's & Fabulous,

Oh, my delicious anonymous wonder! Thank you for this question, which sparkles with life force and longing. Wanting partnership (or just a warm hand across the table) is a divine desire. And desire, my love, is sacred.

Let’s begin with this: you’re not looking for a man. You’re calling one in.

We’ve been sold this dusty myth that if we do all the right things, like join the apps, go to the right events, write the clever bios, we'll somehow earn connection. But here’s the truth, Mama Gena (one of my sassiest, sage-ilicious muses from the School of Womanly Arts) would whisper in your ear with a wink and a feather boa: pleasure is the portal.

So, before you chase anything, let’s flip the script.

Step One: Seduce Yourself First

You want to date a man who’s alive, magnetic, and ready for the richness of midlife? Then become the most ravishing version of yourself! For YOU.

• Wear perfume to the farmer’s market.
• Buy yourself flowers every damn Friday.
• Turn on your favorite music and dance while you fold laundry.

It’s all about vibrating so high on your own pleasure frequency that the right man can’t help but feel the pull.

Step Two: Get Visible & Vibrant

No, not in a “try-harder” kind of way. In a claim-your-space kind of way. Bam!

• Take that class you’ve always been curious about.
• Go to that poetry reading or jazz night solo.
• Join a hiking group or a wine-tasting club.

The man you’re calling in may not be on an app. But he’s somewhere. And he’s likely circling the spaces where people are lit up, curious, and connected to life. Be there too! Not necessarily to find him, but to find YOURSELF in motion. That’s when the magic strikes.

Pro Tip - Walk into that place, as if you are still center stage, radiating light and vibrancy like a sexy, senior spark plug, wrinkles highlighted in glitter! (it's the Bloomified way)

 

Step Three: Use Your Voice

If you’re on the apps (and yes, they can still be useful), let your profile be a love letter to your essence.

No laundry lists. No disclaimers.

Just truth, wit, warmth, and a little wink.

Instead of “Must love dogs and be emotionally available,” try:

“I’m a curious, sensual, wise woman who makes a mean eggplant parmesan and believes in second acts. Looking for someone whose heart is as weathered and wondrous as mine.”

Bluma’s Little Rebellion Ritual:

Write a love note to the man you haven’t met yet.

Describe what it feels like to be with him.

What you’ll wear on your first date.

How you’ll laugh.

How your eyes will meet.

Read it out loud with candlelight and a splash of red lipstick.

Then let it go. Trust the universe is reading it too.

Remember, darling.

You’re blooming.

And the bees will find you.

With lipstick and stardust,

xo Bluma